As I'm sure you all know by now, I'm a rather... anxious person. I have a tendency to over plan, over think and over analyze. This usually means that I am always planning something, always making lists (in my head or on paper), always ticking off the things I need to get done and how I need to do them. When a big event is taking place, I go into absolute overdrive. I make list after list after list, and I try to make sure that every thing is taken care of, and I usually enjoy every moment. The anxiousness is not always a bad characteristic, but it is always exhausting.
This past week in Missouri was wonderful because of all the time I got to see my family and the fun that we had. However, it was absolutely draining. The wedding, Thanksgiving, and the general stress in traveling with the crumb snatchers was a bit much for me and my already over stressed from planning mental state. My body decided it had had enough, and thought that the way to tell me so was to break out my face like I was a teenager, give me cold sores out the wazoo, give me shattering headaches every day and dry out my skin like you wouldn't believe. Quite pleasant.
Normally, as soon as I got home from this harried trip, I would immediately begin a hectic schedule of doing all laundry as to ensure we all started the week with entirely clean wardrobes, then making sure every travel item was put away and every toy was back in place. I would have all our meals for the next week planned and I would have a daily list of things to accomplish. I would expect myself to have these daily lists accomplished by midmorning and then I would spend the rest of the day totally whipped from running like a madwoman all morning. i would then look at my calendar and see the due dates for Christmas things I had given myself (like finishing the shopping by Dec 5, finishing the homemade presents by Dec 1, mailing the christmas cards by Dec 15, etc) and then create lists of what I had to do to achieve those goals I had set for myself.
But when I did get home, a funny thing happened. I made the lists, but halfheartedly. I started the chores, but only got them to a good stopping point, not a finished point. I got the groceries, but neglected the meal plan and I looked at my calendar and realized that my goals were totally unreasonable and arbitrary.
I needed a break.
So instead of making the things I need to get done the focus of my day, I've made resting the focus of my day. I've made lots of hot tea and hot chocolate. I've read good magazines and I've watched a lot of tivo-ed shows. I've planed numerous games of scrabble with Dave, and numerous games of Scrabulous with Sarah and Lu. Dave and I have spent our evenings with a fire, a good meal, playing scrabble or watching tv or both, and snuggling on the couch. I've been knitting and enjoying it, not just getting to and engoal, and I've tried some new sample shampoos and lotions I've been saving up. I've been making hot breakfasts for us each morning (even for Dave, who eats at 6am), and I've been staying in my jammies much longer than I ever would normally. I've taken the kids on a walk to the library and to the park, and we've watched Christmas cartoons and read Christmas books. I've read a lot of blogs and commented on almost none, and talked on the phone to my mom.
It's been nice.
And funny enough, in between all of the resting, I've actually gotten things done bit by bit. The laundry is inching along slow and steady, and the kitchen is staying pretty clean. I scrapped the Christmas goal dates and moved them back so I can enjoy it more. I've created a loose menu plan for the week, and have gathered all of the travel mess and put it into a basket so I can put things away a bit at a time.
For someone who usually attacks everything, this slower pace has been pretty great. I may even try to keep it up. Of course, I would need a schedule. And a plan. And maybe a list.